Online Dating

Matchmaking Tips for Women Part 2- What Men Think About Women?

Your on the internet profile has to be completely different. It can’t be the complete, contrived nonsense of “I love walks on the beach, I love dining out, and I love to travel.” You know what; you need to stand apart from the other 6 Billion people that are online. You want to have catchy, funny on the web profiles and stand out from everybody else. Now having said that, you do know that your photos should be really spectacular and definitely be done professionally. I am not saying it should be a glamour shot, they should be done professionally. You want a photographer to catch the best angle, the best look you can possibly make in a natural, not flashy and again, not a glamour type of a way. Men are visual and they fall in love through their eyes. Women fall in love through their ears, as men have to be intellectual and funny. Men have to possess a great personality. So obviously in terms of women, you need to have a great picture and your bio and profile needs to be short and sweet. Men want to know if you are articulate, they want to know if you have a sense of humor, they want to make sure you are not a drama queen and not a gold digger. Men want to make sure you are not high maintance.  So men do want to make sure that you do not have a lot of characteristics that they don’t want.  Do something completely A typical. 

Every single man I deal with tells me, they're not looking for a supermodel.  They can get that on their own. They need somebody who is intellectually stimulating, and has something between her ears. And basically, you have to be intellectually stimulating and be able to bring something to the table and be able to challenge a man in order to float his boat.  Men are very visual, so they need to be attracted to you. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. what's attractive to a man? A fit woman,  a woman who takes care of her body, a pretty woman, a woman with long pretty hair, straight hair, a pretty smile, and most important, a great personality and a woman who is not a bitch. So beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. Someone can have a number 7 looks, if they have a great figure, really smart, and really challenging, and they bring something to the table for a man that he doesn’t already have, then it’s a done deal.  This makes her a 10.     

If a woman offers to pay on the first day, the guy begins to think several things. He thinks she does not like him, and that’s why she's offering to pay. It’s a turn down, not even a turn off. It brings him down. Don’t do that. Don’t offer to pay on the first date and don’t do the fake reach. If a man is offering for you to join him for dinner, be gracious about it. Accept it and state thank you. That’s the end of the story. Don’t offer to pay. If a guy takes you out two times, and he's a perfect gentlman, then the third time, you basically ask him out and you basically take charge of that third date. And I've to tell you now; maybe because the men have read my books, my guys anticipate that. Some of my guys will ask me if I discussed the third date with them. The bottom line is, if a guy did take you out twice, and you went out for two nice dinners, and again, he was a perfect gentleman, then the third date, you should create it. And the third date, believe it or not, doesn’t even have to cost money. I mean, could you cook him dinner, but not a good idea because now he's in your house. Stay away from you cooking him dinner at your house. You could go pick up food and you guys could go out on a picnic if the weather permits. Whatever it is, even if you go to the movies and dinner, you could get the movies. It’s more about the gesture. It’s not about how much it costs. Men aren’t looking for women to spend their money.  It’s more about the thought that counts.

With over 16 years of experience as a professional matchmaker working exclusively for the nation’s most successful men, Janis Spindel has a unique insider’s perspective on contemporary dating. Her clients tell her exactly what they want in a relationship, in the process revealing the secrets to the male brain.

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